Diablo For the last 15 years
For the last 15 years, as I served as the constant whipping post for thousands...nay, MILLIONS of pathetic worms who have plundered my depths and banished me and my brothers to the soulstones time and time again! NO LONGER! On May 15 in the year of the Panda, 2012, my plan to claim victory over the Nine Hells and the High Heavens has come to fruition! Behold, the chronicle of my journey thus far!
Day 1: Millions of hapless insects gathered with their gold in hand and their steel drawn as they prepared to storm my doorstep, thinking that I, the Lord of Terror, would stand idly by as you farmed me for loot. Little did you suspect that my secret weapon "error 3007" would lay you all low! Those of you that happened to slip by my net came face to face with my uberlieutenants-- Lagmodan, The Serverbreaker,and Archbishop Disconnectus.
Day 2-5: See day 1...
Day 6: The delays caused by my impenetrable server defenses allowed me to fortify the Champions of Hell and overwhelm the puny Nephalem forces when they finally arrived...such awesome and destructive powers as: Molten QQ, Plague of Ridiculous Enrage Timers, and Arcane Orbital Repair Bills. To finalize my triumph, I ensured that any artifacts that my minions were carrying were at LEAST 5 levels lower and were utterly useless to the would-be plunderer. Truly the tears of the righteous are as music to my blackened soul!
Day 7: I rested...
Day 37: I have struck another triumphant blow! I have created a market place for the Nephalem, which is the only means of obtaining artifacts of any significant power. However, the true devious nature of this monstrosity is what makes it so delicious! Read more
